Since Luna posted a review policy, I suppose I should as well.
- Items for review must be sent to be via footman, carrying said items on a silver platter. And that footman must be carried on a silver platter by another footman. (I will keep both platters as part of my compensation package.)
- You will be charged a review fee of 1000L, plus 100L a minute for any size or prim adjustments I have to make for your item to fit.
- If the answer to "Does this make my ass look fat?" is "Yes" - you're dead meat.
- Any mention of my name in association with your product must be accompanied by trumpets. Not a recording of trumpet played back on a prim-trumpet or a recording of trumpets over the parcel stream - actual live trumpets.
- Since it's hard to precisely mix the scents of burning villages and the stench of fear and carnage, my prefered fragrance is WD-40.
- I will not walk any runway that others have walked. You will de-rez their runway, lay down the prims for mine, and then replace it back for the other models.
- 110% of all sales. 120% of nonsales. 130% of Soupy Sales.
Void where prohibited by law, your mileage my vary, and contents may have settled during shipping.
(APRIL 8 2010 - This still applies, of course. Not that I get much to review these days. Whew.)
Comments (9)
good thing i have a trumpet in the attic. I can't play any more so the best you'll get is some awful spitting sounds.
Posted by Dedric Mauriac | August 28, 2008 9:42 AM
Posted on August 28, 2008 09:42
Crap you are awesome. I laughed hard at this post.
Posted by chestnut | August 28, 2008 9:48 AM
Posted on August 28, 2008 09:48
I'm with Chestnut- this is one of the funniest things I've read in awhile!
Now, I think you need to also write up a rider for when you make public appearances such as at parties, weddings, or other events.
Posted by Nika Dreamscape | August 28, 2008 11:06 AM
Posted on August 28, 2008 11:06
Number one rule for appearances has to be that everyone in attendance must say "OMG its CRAP MARINER!" That is, of course, after the trumpets
Posted by chestnut | August 28, 2008 11:16 AM
Posted on August 28, 2008 11:16
Is a buculus trumpet enough? If so where the hell did I place that damned bull?
Posted by Keeme | August 28, 2008 1:26 PM
Posted on August 28, 2008 13:26
I was told the official greeting was "I thought I banned his ass" but I could be wrong :)
Posted by CeNedra Rivera | August 28, 2008 2:01 PM
Posted on August 28, 2008 14:01
This why I love crap ... and Crap too!!
I laughed at the post ... then at me. Thank you I really needed a good hard laugh.
Posted by Luna Jubilee | August 28, 2008 4:45 PM
Posted on August 28, 2008 16:45
/me has to learn how to make a silver plate... HAHA
Posted by Ana Lutetia | August 29, 2008 8:03 AM
Posted on August 29, 2008 08:03
Ahhh..that was toooo funny, thank you Luna for sharing! =)
Posted by Felicity Blumenthal | August 29, 2008 5:34 PM
Posted on August 29, 2008 17:34