Your ass is coming apart Friday night and headed back to the store Saturday for restocking.

Until then, your ass is mine.

I could play around with some Linux distributions on your overpowered schizophrenic hide.

But if I'm feeling really, really evil...

You know, that motherboard... that memory... that processor... that video card...

With all your intermittent lockups, I don't think you're crashing quite fast enough.

Maybe you need to feel the burn of overclocking through your veins.

Just to let you know how it's felt on my end of our brief and painful relationship.

Running a little hot?

How about... a little more speed?

You'll be begging for me to take you apart and box you up for return.

But, of course, that takes effort. And a bit of caution on my part so that you don't end up smoked.

You've got an hour and a half to ponder your fate.

When I power you up, remove your sound drivers as this FAQ suggested, and restart... I'd suggest you behave yourself and run smoothly.

I want to be able to stand tall and proud, knowing I've accomplished my task once and for all, and then have the willpower to scatter your pieces to the four winds once more.